Getting to the Root of Mass Shootings: Why a “Single-Fix” Mindset Misses the Mark Mass shootings are one of the most painful and polarizing topics in American life. Communities grieve, politics harden, and the conversation often collapses into a tug-of-war over gun laws versus mental health. If we’re serious about saving lives, we have to get past slogans and build a prevention strategy that matches the complexity of the problem. That starts with a hard look at what the data actually show about who commits these attacks, why they do it, and what works to stop them—before the shooting starts. 
12 Habits That Will
Earn You More Respect
12 Habits That Will
Earn You More Respect

12 Habits That Will Earn You More Respect—And Help You Lead With Integrity
In life and business, respect isn’t given—it’s earned. While charisma and credentials may open a few doors, it’s your habits that determine whether those doors stay open.
Respect is the quiet currency of leadership. It can’t be demanded, and it certainly isn’t automatic. But if you embody the right set of values and behaviors—consistently—you’ll command respect without ever needing to ask for it. This post explores 12 powerful habits that will help you build respect in your personal, professional, and leadership journey. These habits aren’t complicated, but they do require intentionality, humility, and consistency.
Let’s dive in.
1. Keep Your Word, Every Time
“Do what you promise, even when it’s hard or no one notices.”
The quickest way to earn or lose respect? Your ability to follow through. In a world filled with broken commitments and empty words, honoring your promises stands out. Whether it’s meeting a deadline, showing up for a friend, or simply being on time, keeping your word builds trust.
Why It Matters:
• Creates reliability and dependability
• Builds trust over time
• Shows that you take responsibility seriously
How to Practice:
• Don’t overcommit—say yes only when you mean it
• Use a system (calendar, task manager) to track your commitments
• Communicate early if circumstances change
Consistency is character. When people know they can count on you, your respect skyrockets.
2. Show Up Early, Not Just On Time
“Being five minutes early says you value other people’s time.”
Punctuality is about more than just the clock. It’s a sign of professionalism and respect. Showing up early shows that you’re prepared, focused, and considerate. It demonstrates foresight and reliability. It’s also a subtle leadership habit that shows you take your role seriously—even if it’s informal.
Why It Matters:
• Signals reliability and preparation
• Reduces stress and last-minute scrambling
• Builds confidence in others
How to Practice:
• Plan buffer time into your schedule
• Prepare your materials the night before meetings or events
• Arrive early and use the extra time to review, center yourself, or greet others
It’s not just about being early—it’s about showing that you care.
3. Take Ownership When You Mess Up
“Say ‘I made a mistake’ instead of making excuses or blaming others.”
Owning your mistakes is one of the fastest ways to gain respect—especially in leadership. While most people deflect or rationalize, those who take responsibility stand apart. It shows maturity, emotional intelligence, and a commitment to growth. Mistakes don’t ruin your reputation—denying them does.
Why It Matters:
• Increases trust and accountability
• Sets a tone of integrity
• Invites honest communication
How to Practice:
• Avoid defensiveness when receiving feedback
• Use language like: “Here’s what happened, and here’s what I’ll do differently next time.”
• Apologize without adding blame: “I take full responsibility.”
People respect humility and growth far more than perfection.
4. Listen First, Speak Second
“Focus fully on understanding before thinking about your response.”
True listening is a superpower in a world full of noise. Respectful people seek to understand before being understood. Great communicators listen to learn, not to reply. They pause, reflect, and ask thoughtful follow-up questions.
Why It Matters:
• Builds deeper relationships
• Helps prevent misunderstandings
• Makes others feel valued and heard
How to Practice:
• Pause before responding—give space
• Use phrases like: “Tell me more…” or “What do you mean by that?”
• Avoid interrupting, multitasking, or forming responses too early
Listening shows respect—and it earns it back tenfold.
5. Skip the Office Gossip
“Never talk badly about people when they aren’t in the room.”
Gossip erodes trust. It’s a fast-track to short-term attention and long-term disrespect. Respectful people don’t participate in character assassination—even when it’s subtle. They defend reputations, redirect conversations, and set boundaries.
Why It Matters:
• Protects your integrity
• Builds a culture of trust and safety
• Prevents toxic work environments
How to Practice:
• Change the subject when gossip arises
• Praise in public, critique in private
• Speak positively about others, even when they’re not around
If someone will gossip with you, they’ll gossip about you. Rise above it.
6. Say What You Mean, Clearly
“Use simple words and give direct answers instead of maybes.”
Clarity is kindness. Vagueness, hedging, or passive communication creates confusion and distrust. People respect those who speak with honesty, simplicity, and confidence.
Why It Matters:
• Reduces miscommunication
• Demonstrates self-assuredness
• Builds credibility
How to Practice:
• Avoid jargon, double-speak, or filler words
• Speak directly, but with respect
• Practice assertive communication: honest + kind
Don’t say “maybe” when you mean “no.” Don’t say “we’ll see” when you mean “yes.” Speak clearly, and you’ll be respected for your authenticity.
7. Bring Solutions, Not Just Problems
“Come with ideas to fix issues instead of just pointing them out.”
Anyone can point out what’s wrong. Respect is earned when you step up with potential solutions. Whether it’s a team project, a client issue, or a family conflict—contribution is more valuable than criticism.
Why It Matters:
• Positions you as a proactive leader
• Encourages progress and momentum
• Shifts focus to improvement, not blame
How to Practice:
• Before speaking up, ask: What’s one way we could fix this?
• Use solution-oriented language: “Here’s what I think might work…”
• Be collaborative: “What do you think about trying…?”
You don’t need all the answers—but bringing ideas shows you care.
8. Go the Extra Mile, Consistently
“Do a little more than what’s expected in everything you tackle.”
Excellence is rare. Most people stop at “good enough.” Going the extra mile is how you stand out, build a reputation, and create real value. It could mean staying late to finish a project, sending a thoughtful follow-up email, or doing a bit more than you were asked.
Why It Matters:
• Builds trust and admiration
• Sets you apart in competitive environments
• Attracts opportunities, referrals, and promotions
How to Practice:
• Find small ways to exceed expectations
• Look for details others miss
• Make generosity and craftsmanship your trademarks
Going the extra mile is never crowded—and that’s why it’s respected.
9. Make Room for Others to Shine
“Give specific credit and praise for teammates’ good work and ideas.”
Respect isn’t a solo act. One of the best ways to earn it is to share the spotlight. Great leaders and respected colleagues make others look good. They credit, encourage, and uplift. They multiply impact by celebrating others.
Why It Matters:
• Builds loyalty and team morale
• Shows emotional intelligence and humility
• Elevates your leadership presence
How to Practice:
• Publicly praise others for their work
• Use inclusive language: “We” instead of “I”
• Mentor or advocate for rising talent
When you help others win, people want to follow you.
10. Ask for Honest Feedback
“Request input on how to improve, then actually use the advice.”
Most people avoid feedback because it’s uncomfortable. Respected people seek it out—and then do something with it. Feedback is fuel for growth. It’s how you get better faster, build deeper trust, and keep your blind spots in check.
Why It Matters:
• Demonstrates humility and self-awareness
• Builds trust with colleagues and clients
• Speeds up your improvement curve
How to Practice:
• Ask: “What’s one thing I could do better?”
• Thank people for their honesty, even if it stings
• Apply the feedback and show your progress
Feedback isn’t criticism—it’s an investment in your excellence.
11. Stay Curious, Not Judgmental
“Ask questions to understand rather than jumping to quick conclusions.”
Respected people lead with curiosity. They pause before reacting. They seek context before assuming intent. In contrast, quick judgment shuts down connection and learning.
Why It Matters:
• Reduces conflict and miscommunication
• Promotes open-mindedness
• Helps you become a better leader and listener
How to Practice:
• Replace “Why did you do that?” with “Can you help me understand your thinking?”
• Ask clarifying questions instead of jumping to conclusions
• Embrace learning over ego
Curiosity connects. Judgment divides.
12. Keep Your Cool Under Pressure
“Stay calm when things get tough so you can think clearly.”
Storms will come. What separates leaders from the rest is their calm in the chaos. Staying composed during high-stakes moments earns instant respect. It reassures others, anchors teams, and allows for sound decisions.
Why It Matters:
• Builds confidence in others
• Helps you solve problems with clarity
• Sets the emotional tone for those around you
How to Practice:
• Breathe deeply and pause before responding
• Practice stress management tools (journaling, movement, prayer)
• Train your mind with small discomforts to handle bigger ones
Grace under pressure is one of the highest forms of leadership.
Final Thoughts: Respect Is Built One Habit at a Time
You don’t need to change everything overnight. Respect is not built through grand gestures—it’s built through small, consistent choices.
Start with one habit this week. Maybe it’s listening more. Or owning a mistake. Or skipping the gossip. Then stack the next one. Over time, these habits won’t just earn you respect—they’ll make you the kind of person you respect.
Because at the end of the day, true respect starts within.


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Tim is a graduate of Iowa State University and has a Mechanical Engineering degree. He spent 40 years in Corporate America before retiring and focusing on other endeavors. He is active with his loving wife and family, volunteering, keeping fit, running the West Egg businesses, and writing blogs and articles for the newspaper.
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